Forgiveness: A Journey Within

Forgiveness: A Journey Within
By PahPah

Forgiveness begins with acknowledging harm and the marks it leaves within us. It is not about excusing or erasing but about transforming—clearing the weight and restoring our wholeness.

To forgive inside our hearts, or even to write of forgiveness, there must first be acknowledgment of harm. Harm does not exist in a vacuum; it has been done, intentionally or otherwise, by the hand of another. Someone, at some point, held control over that harm being unleashed—whether they were aware of it or not. That moment of release, whether accidental or deliberate, became the seed of hurt.

Yet, harm is not always born in the one who delivers it. Often, it is inherited—a cycle, a shadow passed down through generations, culture, or circumstance. It is important to recognise that the person who harmed may not have generated the act itself but became a carrier, unknowingly or knowingly continuing the chain.

Anger as Catalyst
Anger emerges as a response to harm. It signals the need for change, for something to be broken—often the old patterns, the unconscious cycles. In this way, anger is neither enemy nor villain but a force calling for transformation. However, anger alone cannot complete the journey; it is the beginning, not the end.

Does Forgiveness Require Understanding?
Does forgiveness rely on understanding why someone caused harm? Not always. While understanding can open a doorway, forgiveness often arises through compassion—a choice to soften the hold of anger and pain for the sake of our own hearts. Compassion allows us to see the humanity in the other, even when their actions have caused us suffering.

Forgiveness as Clearing and Restoring
Forgiveness is a clearing and a restoring. It is a letting go of that which was locked inside—a burden held tightly in the heart. When we forgive, we open the gates and release the weight, freeing ourselves from the chains that bound us.

When we forgive, we reclaim ourselves. Until that moment, we are operating without a part of our wholeness, as though the harm had stolen a fragment of who we are. Forgiveness is the act of bringing ourselves back together, of restoring what is ours. It is not about excusing the harm but about choosing to no longer allow it to define us.

A Personal Reflection
When I think about who I need to forgive, and the steps I have already taken in my life to forgive for the betterment of my own personal relationships, I feel a sense of clarity. With the understanding I now have, I do not find power in holding onto the hurt. Instead, I see how that hurt manifested, how it came to be, and I release it. I smile with joy at the relationships I have now, freed from the weight of the past.

For example, I am no longer under the water, struggling to cope with something else that feels beyond my control. Instead, I am floating—light, buoyant, and able to choose something else, something that feels good in my heart. Forgiveness is the choice to let go of the struggle, to rise above, and to embrace the joy that is always present when we are free.

Forgiving the 'You' Within
When I write to forgive, I realise that forgiveness is not for you, the person who caused harm. It is for the ‘you’ that lives within me—the part of myself that still carries the hurt, the story, and the weight of what happened. In forgiving, I release myself.

Inside me, you have always been just human. Not a superhuman, not a god, not an enlightened being—simply a human being, like me. An intentional, flawed, and evolving being.

Forgiveness, then, becomes a way of honouring our shared humanity. It is a choice to free the heart, to let go of the weight of harm, and to create space for something new to take root. In forgiving, I am not excusing harm; I am choosing to no longer let it define me. I am choosing to return to love, to connection, and to the centre of my being.

This is the power of forgiveness—it begins within.

We are inviting you to join our conversations

Now take a moment, quiet your mind and listen to your heart.

What does forgiveness mean to you?

How has forgiveness changed your sense of being and your relationships?

Do you think forgiveness is influenced by your own culture, spiritual practices, family upbringing or is there something else that has guided your journey with forgiveness. Let us know below.